| MARRIAGE ENCOUNTER |
| Survey of activities | |
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HENK ROLVERS - involved with MARRIAGE ENCOUNTER |
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WHAT IS MARRIAGE ENCOUNTER ?
When a man and a woman want to give themselves to each another in marriage, they want to give shape to the dream they have for their further life. In the same way a person who feels a vocation to the priesthood or to the religious life has a dream. With the lapse of time a levelling down of the relation husband/wife, priest-religious/community may occur. A relationship needs care and attention to remain sound and to be able to grow. |
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Marriage Encounter offers any one who feels in need of it support to achieve more or new depth. This is given in weekends organised by a priest and some married couples. The picture alongside: a regional day in Haarlem, where Kees Maas SVD introduces the theme - flanked by other leaders, male and female ... |
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| It is difficult to give an exact idea of what Marriage Encounter is like, because everybody undergoes the weekend in their own way. It is a personal experience. |
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The team, a priest and some couples, tell about their experiences from their own common-or-garden practice. So it is by no means a theoretical weekend, not a sort of retreat or training. We are not told how things ought to be done, or not to be done. The facilitating team tells about concrete things that may be in the minds of all of us. |
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In this way the participants will gain an insight into their own environment, emotions and ways of behaving. They are urged to reflect more on themselves and to be more open to the ideas of their partners. A mirror is held up, as it were. . |
| On the basis of questions each married couple is invited to discuss the answers, asking each other questions of what has been put down on paper. These are not group discussions. |
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Priests or religious (also) set out in twos.
The weekend is inspired by the way Jesus associated with people and with God. |
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PERSONAL EXPERIENCES | |
The weekend I participated in, in 1982, was the result of a request made by some kind people who, as they phrased it, would be pleased for me to have such an experience. For some time I had been walking around with the desire to give renewed inspiration to the dream I had as a young religious. I had tried to find this in retreats and reading spiritual literature, but I did not make much headway. At the weekend, however, I did. My first experience was the discovery who I was for myself, how I saw myself with my positive and my negative sides, how I lived with my fellow brothers and with everybody I came into contact with in a special way. They proved to be the same experiences married couples discover in each other. I was reached a way of life on the level of the emotions and this was exactly what I as a religious (and properly speaking all religious) had very much difficulty with. I had never learned to discuss emotions at whatever level, which had really made me a perfect loner in my community. The weekend taught me how to get rid of those galling bonds and to be open to others. ln this way I could really be present, heart and soul, in my community and discover what my fellow brothers meant to me. I also had this experience in my dialogue with married couples and priests. Sharing my dreams and my accompanying feelings and being allowed to listen to the experiences and emotions of others opened quite a new world in my being a religious. I may say that this way of life is of great influence on my everyday life, because I discover, for instance, from what inner need I react and act in a certain way. In the community of Marriage Encounter I may pass on what I feel in various fields, for instance in writing articles, sharing at encounter evenings and in dialogues with some married couples. . I am very happy to be able, as a religious, to help build the Kingdom of God in this way. Henk Rolvers, August 2001 | |
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Some more photographs reflecting the atmosphere at these encounters: | |
 | At a regional day in Haarlem: "Who or what keeps us going?" |
| Just a minute for a cup of coffee.... |
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Do you like to know more ? The (Dutch / International) M.E. website is: www.marriage-encounter.nl |
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